Monday, January 13, 2014

Don't You Forget About Me

You know how when you die, people will display pictures of you in collages and around the casket and that's how everyone remembers you? Well, obviously if you had died, you wouldn't be reading this. Or maybe you would. I'm almost positive my dad reads this blog and approves... Hi Dad!

Anyway, I'm sure everyone has pictures they definitely wants included in that collage. Here is mine:

This was at the Hanger's Club, a male strip club in Maryland. A group of my friends took me there for my 21st birthday. I'd just gotten off work, which is why I'm dressed a little formally. Obviously I'm wearing panty hose because even though I'm white, I'm not that smoothly white! Other than that, I love everything about this picture. My hair was under control for a change and even though I'd had a baby a little under a year ago, I was still crazy skinny. And look how happy I am! Give me some cheesy male strippers and I am a happy camper! (It could be why I watched Magic Mike this afternoon, which felt vaguely dirty on a Monday afternoon). It was a great night and one of those stories I will tell my grandchildren when I'm old so I can skeeve them out.

This is how I want to be remembered! But knowing me, I will be remembered by a selfie of me holding a cat:

Wearing this...

What's that, do you ask? Let's pull back...

A little more...

Yes, that's a cat in a knitted hat with snowflakes all around. (By this time none of the cats would let me hold them for a selfie. Cats are notoriously private and don't like social media. Plus I think they hated my shirt).
So if anyone reading this is responsible for any collages related to me, please make sure I'm not always remembered as a cat lady. Throw in the Hanger's Club picture so that I seem both desperately lonely and a crazy cat lady. That's much better!

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