Things that anger me for no rational reason:
1. Those family stickers on people's cars. You know what I mean. The mom, the dad, the kids... The other day, I shit you not, I saw a turtle and a fish on someone's car. Yes, even the fish rate a sticker now. Whenever one of those people cut in front of me or even gently change lanes in front of me, I just want to step on the gas and rear end them. Why? No reason. Cute things apparently annoy me.
2. BMW's and their drivers. Since I live and work in the DC metropolitan area, there are a lot of people with more money with me. A lot more money. A LOT. I'm fine with this. They "usually" work hard for it and deserve it. (I'm thinking of some government workers and politicians when I say "usually"). But as soon as I see a BMW, I get angry. And I see a lot of them. On the way to work this morning, I was thinking of this list and looked around and saw two of them right at that moment. They just seem like such pretentious show-off cars. At least with a Mercedes or a Lexus, you give the appearance of class. You are refined without being flashy. BMW is just like, "Hey, here is my money in YOUR face!"
There's this BMW at my work, that I swear to God, looks just like a penis. It has an elongated front end. It's like the definition of phallic. It just screams, "If you had money, you could drive in a giant penis too! Here's my penis car IN YOUR FACE!"
3. Justin Moore's song, "If Heaven Wasn't So Far Away." Only country music fans will know what I'm talking about. And I'm pretty sure one of my friends ranted about this on Facebook as well, but this song makes me so angry. The song itself is pretty. It's the lyrics that are the problem. The premise of the song is that if heaven wasn't so far away, he would:
"I'd pack up the kids and go for the day. Introduce them to their grandpaw."
He goes on mentioning all the other assorted relatives and people he has lost that he would visit in heaven. But I think what bothers me if that you can't do that. It's pointless to think about it. Those who have lost someone close to them know that this is just dangerous thinking. You have to move on. If there's a heaven or not (everyone has their opinion), we won't know until it's our time.
Every time that song comes on and I feel myself singing along, I get angry all over again. Who is this guy to stir up these emotions?
4. Speaking of emotions. Another thing that angers me is when a song purposely manipulates me into crying. Has anyone heard the song, "I'll Walk." OMG. Talk about freaking annoying. Here is the song in a nutshell.
A couple go to their prom.
On the way home they get into a fight.
She demands he lets her out of the car so she can walk. "I'll walk." She says.
He agrees, although it's night out, and for some odd reason she's wearing a black dress to prom. I guess that's what chicks do nowadays. I don't know.
She then gets hit by a truck. Or is it a car? Does it matter? Maybe it was a train.
She can't walk.
He drives to the hospital guilt-laden, as he should be. Why would you let a teenage girl walk alone at night?!? Hello???
But of course she's a martyr and is like, "It's ok. I'll walk."
I guess he sticks around for awhile (out of guilt) and finally he asks to marry her (out of guilt).
She's at the wedding in her wheelchair and she's like, "I'll walk." And stands up. It's a miracle!!
I HATE THIS SONG.
If you don't believe me, listen to it:
It's awful. If you write a song that touches me enough to cry, it's wonderful. It's cathartic. But if I know you are writing a song just to get me to cry, I get pissed.
Christmas Shoes anyone?
I guess that's all for today. That's probably more than enough. Until next time... I'll walk to my penis car with the stickers on it and crank up some tunes... Maybe I'll visit my Grandpaw. WTF?