Tuesday, January 7, 2014

What Was I Thinking?

Tonight I decided to start a new series of posts called, "What was I thinking?" Mainly because I was flipping through some old pictures tonight and thought, "What was I thinking?"


Light bulb! (But the energy saving one...we  can no longer have incandescent thoughts...) Idea alert!

Now I warn you. This picture is scary. And you know it has not been Photoshopped since there was obviously no Photoshop when it was taken. The back of the picture says May 91, but there's a Christmas tree, so it was probably developed later. I would like to say it was Christmas of 90, but I was never good about developing my pictures in a timely manner, so that would just be a guesstimate.

If there are any children in the room, please encourage them to leave. I don't want to scar them for life...

Are you ready? I'm not. But here we go anyway...

What was I thinking?

Now I know you'll be tempted to use this as your Christmas card, but please don't. I'm using it for mine next year!

If you are having a hard time processing the glory of this picture, let me tell you what you're looking at. It's me in feetie pajama's with a dog in my crotch region. I'm not sure which dog since my mom loves Scottish Terrier's and we always had one. Since it's 91, I'm thinking it's Fred. But it doesn't really matter since it was years ago and they've all since died. Possibly of humiliation.

The worse part is that it was the 90's so there was no selfies, which means someone took this picture. It might have been my brother, but I'd hate to think I would ever force him to witness this. If it was and he reads this, I'm sorry!

Feety pajamas should not be worn over the age of five. Plus, I can tell by my the smoothness of my hair that it was brushed for a change so I obviously planned this picture carefully and purposely staged it this way. I'm not sure why my hair looks so white though. I also don't know why I'm doing a weird alien claw with my hand. Maybe the alien abduction cause premature greying.

Possible Captions:

"I'm too sexy for this Scotty."

"I don't always pose in feetie pajamas, but when I do, I traumatize family pets."

I like that above me on the wall it says "Welcome" with two Scotties on the side. Welcome is definitely not the message being portrayed by this picture. It's more like, "I love Scotties. I have a bunch in my basement. With my feetie pajamas collection. 'It rubs the lotion on the skin'." 

My feet practically itch just thinking about feetie pajamas. Maybe this is the reason. After this picture I could never wear them again. PTFS. Post traumatic feetie syndrome.

I apologize for any damage I've caused by this picture. I apologize. I will give you plenty of warning for the next time. Because there will be a next time. Apparently posing with animals was something I enjoyed doing... I was a lonely child.

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