Remote Madness

What is it with men and the remote control? No, seriously, what is up with that? My husband holds onto the remote like it's the ring from Lord of the Rings. My Precious. If I can't find the remote in the morning, I look in the bed and it's usually there. Sometimes he has his arms wrapped around it like Radar with his Teddy Bear. Ok, that's a slight exaggeration. But not by much.

Now that we're temporarily living in one room at my MIL's house, we only have one television to watch. Usually I'm fine with that since I have my laptop and really that's all I need. And if I ask really nicely, he'll "allow" me to watch shows like Grey's Anatomy and Top Chef. But usually it's not worth the fight to ask for anything else. I think he pouted the entire time I watched the CMA's last week. If watching hot men is wrong, I don't want to be right!

So last night he fell asleep while watching the news. I knew he was asleep because he was snoring quite loudly. I tried falling asleep as well, but I can't sleep with the news on. It stresses me out. (Yes, we keep the television on at night...we just need noise). After trying to sleep for about ten minutes, I searched for the remote (next to him of course) and scrolled through the guide until I found Grey's Anatomy on Lifetime. It was the episode from last season with Seth Green. I rolled over and closed my eyes.

Suddenly, I realized I wasn't listening to McDreamy or McSteamy or any of my Mcfriends. I was listening to the news! WTF? I turned over and saw my husband holding the remote. I said, "What happened to Grey's Anatomy? Do you have a sensor that says, 'Melanie is trying to turn the channel...must wake up.'" He ignored me then LEFT THE ROOM.

Seriously! He didn't want to watch TV, he just didn't want me to watch something! Ok, I don't even think he was awake yet. I don't even think he was aware I was watching something. I just think that the first thing he thinks about is his precious.

I won't even talk about the hours and hours spent on The Weather Channel. Ask me the weather for any state in the US! I can tell you the forecast! Did you know it's snowing in Cleveland? It is!

I can't wait until our new place is ready so I can have my own remote again. Oh and my DVR. Because this really sucks. It's 34 degrees in Chicago, BTW.

Maybe one day I'll discuss when they lose the remote and suddenly YOU know where it is even though you're not allowed to touch it. No, I'll save that for another day...